A Numbing Reality

I asked the class of 26 8th grade boys to raise their hands if they had ever accidentally or intentionally come across pornography on the Internet. 52 hands flew up in the air without hesitation.

We discussed the prevalence of porn-sites when researching topics as benign as Malcolm X, lacrosse sticks or pets.

We discussed the barriers that used to exist if renting pornographic movies at a video store vs. the click of the mouse today.

We discussed the evolution of pornography from images that allowed one to create one's own fantasy - to today's live-stream, Internet porn which creates virtual worlds of arousal: Worlds that numb one to the reality of how we are wired to be aroused.

Then a boy asked the question I was hoping for, "Is watching pornography harmful at all?"

I answered, "Yes. And we are currently finding out just how harmful." (See article in Psychology Today about pornography induced erectile dysfunction in men "with a heavy use of today's Internet porn and increasing need for more extreme material..")

I continued,"I hope you all have positive, healthy sexual experiences in life. I hope you all are able to experience sexual intimacy in just the way Mother Nature intended: live, person to person, skin to skin, with trust, love, and respect.

Producers of pornography do not care about any of that. They are trying to hijack your sexuality by snagging your interest with more and more extreme, twisted, misogynistic material.

Research is showing too much of this stuff numbs you to being able to be aroused with a real partner in real life."

Then a student asked, "Is it OK to think about sexual stuff in our own minds?"

I cheered, "Yes! Yes! Yes! As much as you want. FILL your mind with your OWN thoughts!"

Click here for one of the best descriptions of Porn Evolution.

More Adult Version of Sex Ed

I wrote this for a Crazy Sexy Life well beyond puberty.
Posted on the site: CrazySexyLife.com

Condom Day

The 8th grade sex ed unit builds towards the last day, Condom Day, when the boys will get to open and investigate the properties of a condom.

The only guideline for Condom Day is:
At the end of class all 26 condom wrappers and all 26 condoms are returned to me.

I hand out the condoms and the room fills with joy.

Boys put them over their hands and up their arms, and over their feet and up their ankles.

One even put it over his head like a bathing cap.


They play with them like sock puppets talking with each other. One conversation went, "Hello, I see we have similar interests", while shaking condomized hands.

Some condoms tear under the gentle tug of a finger nail.

Some boys blow them up with as much air as they can muster, only to have it pop when tossed to the ceiling.

Some boys fill their condoms with water from the water fountain and tie them off.

A cluster of boys presents me with with bouquet of blown up condoms.

All the while I see boys- in the light of day- learn how to safely open, carefully un-scroll and curiously test the strength of condoms.

All in the style that boys prepare to be responsible men.


All 26 returned.