Hairy Areola

On breast day we start with nipples and work our way in.
“Everyone has nipples. Girls, boys, men, women, we all have nipples. Nipples are the part that stick out. They resemble showerheads with twenty or so tiny openings through which breast milk flows from a nursing mother. What makes that such a brilliant design?”

Invariably the students identify that pin-sized openings help keep infection out and numerous openings keep everything flowing even if a few get plugged up.

We continue to the next visible landmark, which I initially refer to as the pepperoni. “The pepperoni-shaped, darker area behind and surrounding the nipple is called the areola. Areola is pronounced ‘air-ee-o-la’. Say it three times.”

“Areola, areola, areola!” the class chants.

A student’s hand is up, “Could you please spell that?”

“Yes, a-r-e-o-l-a.” I answer.

Suddenly he is up heading for the bookshelf in the back of the room, “Listen to all those vowels! I need a dictionary. What is the plural?” We all wait as he locates the word. I hear a few mumbles about how areola sounds a lot like Ariel, the Little Mermaid.

Then he declares,"Yes, listen to this. The plural of areola is: ‘areolae’ or ‘areolas’. What great scrabble words!”

I ask, “With whom do you play scrabble?”

“My parents.”

"Oh" I say, wondering if I should cringe.

“One more thing about areolas, or areolae – which ever you prefer. Occasionally a few hairs sprout around the areola. Yes, some of us are doomed to have hairy areolas. ‘Hairy areola’ sort of rhymes. So you'll never forget how to pronounce it - say 'hairy areola' three times.”

They shout, “Hairy areola, hairy areola, hairy areola!”

Poetry.






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